Are you wondering why you find yourself re-inspiring your ex when you’re aware that it will just end in heartache? And why you aren’t able to stop thinking about a breakup which was many years ago? Let me provide solutions to your questions. In this blog I’ll go over 14 fascinating facts about why do we keep going back to each other.
1. One or the other of you are not emotionally available
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The phrase “emotionally inaccessible” is a bit unclear and can be interpreted differently by various people. Here’s how I’ve seen the term and I believe it’s logical.
For my mind, “emotionally unavailable” means you’re focused on something outside that hinders the ability to have a balanced mental state.
That is, you’re dealing with something from your past or present that is affecting your thoughts and emotions. It could be a previous trauma that you’ve never fully dealt with or a negative relationship with your family or a parent such as.
People who are emotionally unresponsive are obsessed with something that is from their past or their present which means that the person they are with isn’t able to overcome those barriers. This means that no matter how much you love the person you love you’ll have a difficult to get over them.
This is the reason you’re constantly contemplating him or her and the reason why breaking up caused so much pain.
2. You can’t find your dream person
Have you ever had the experience of hearing you or your acquaintance saying, “I’ve always had a obsession with the person I’ve been with for a long time?”
We all have certain people we keep coming back to for the reason that even though we’re no longer in their company, they cause us to be agitated. It’s as if they have an influence over us.
If you aren’t able to find that perfect person share your life together, you’re heart goes back to the person you left.
But wait! There’s more!
This ability isn’t only about being still attracted to your ex. It’s as well an issue of when you’ve started dating someone else you’ll find out that they don’t satisfy you the way your former partner did.
You are feeling unsatisfied in your relationship with your spouse and it becomes very difficult to progress in a healthy manner. When you finally recognized what’s transpired and it’s too late, you’re caught in a full-on rebound relationship.
3. You’re not prepared for a new romance.
You’re probably aware of how difficult it is in letting go someone you love. Have you ever considered the reasons why it’s so difficult to let go?
The main reason lies in the fact that you’re not yet ready to start a new relationship!
Let me explain.
First thing that occurs when we break with the person we love is feeling empty or lonely. We grieve for that person and often think about what went wrong. So we think about why we’re just not enough and the reason why they quit us.
We feel guilty for any reason, and it’s like we are looking to fix things with us once more. This is why you’re constantly contemplating your former partner. Trust me!
This is why you continue trying to contact your ex-partner and they feel the same.
4. You are dealing with unresolved issues with a previous relationship and are seeking resolution
You’ve probably heard the phrase “the initial cut will be the most deep” you know?
When we go through heartbreak from an earlier relationship, we tend to return to the person. It’s as if we want closure or a resolution to these issues.
Here’s what I am referring to.
There’s a good chance that you’ve been hurt by someone in the course of your life. And you’ll come back to the person who hurt you when you start a new relationship. However, there’s a reason behind to the reason this occurs. It’s because you’re looking for closure and want to discover how the relationship did not work initially.
You’d like to know what you did or something else about someone else. You want forgiveness from that person in exchange for your part in the issue.
5. Your twin flames are the same flames
Be prepared for a shock!
The reason you keep returning to your ex is because they are like your twin flame!
This is the essence of the ” twin flame” theory is about. The idea behind the term “twin flame” is when you meet someone identical to you in a way that you realize that the person is meant to be yours from the beginning.
Based on the theories the theory, your partner has been around with you for several lives, and they return in your life at the time you’re ready to take it seriously.
Your twin releases the same thoughts emotions, feelings, and thoughts inside you that you carry inside yourself. Their presence opens the most buried parts of your brain and help you cleanse and heal yourself.
Here are some indicators that can help you tell whether your ex-partner is actually an identical twin:
- You can instantly connect with them, especially during situations of crisis.
- They reflect you thoughts, emotions and feelings back to them.
- There is no control over your thoughts and feelings about them.
- They are memories you have of them even before you ever met.
- It’s as if they’ve been around for all the time.
You might think this isn’t what’s happening with your former partner. There are other motives behind why both of you continue to go back to each other, continue studying.
6.”Rebound” effect “rebound” effect
Another fact about returning to an ex-partner can be”rebound. “rebound” result.
Let me explain:
When you are in a new relationship there’s a normal tendency to be sad for your ex. If you’re struck with the feeling of loss and empty, you’ll likely be tempted to contact your ex. Since you were the one to leave you.
This is the reason why people are drawn to another person right after breaking up, and that’s why many couples fall in love with each other right after they’ve separated.
The worst part is when the relationship does not work out, because it’ll leave you feeling lonely and unfulfilling. What do you think of?
Surprise, you’re ex!
You’ll probably be wondering what you could have done to give the relationship more time, or if it was something you did. This will cause you to contact your ex again, and it’s the rebound effect that is taking place.
7. You and your partner have a lot of experience with each other
This is particularly the case if you were an affair that ended with your former partner for several years.
Have you ever considered the reason why many ex-lovers are in a relationship after separating? It’s because they may love one another!
If you’ve been around an individual for a long period of period of time, you become familiar with speaking to them often. It also becomes habitual to talking about your various interests and hobbies that is why you feel connected with that person.
When the relationship comes to an end then it’s difficult to get used to the new. When you start feeling lonely and unfulfilling, you’ll be tempted to write a note asking the person to are missing you just as you are missing them. It’s exactly the same thing between you and your ex.
8. You’re not familiar with the place
We’ve already discussed one of the main reasons you are drawn back to your ex-partner when you break up, is because you aren’t enjoying the intimacy they bring.
We require someone with whom we feel familiar with to feel comfortable and secure. We aren’t at ease without them and that’s why we require someone to make us feel more complete.
It’s better to have someone else to take care of and cook for as well as clean after yourself as it makes you feel secure and at home.
But keep in mind that there are reasons to go between two people in a relationship can be detrimental for you. For instance it can cause you to feel trapped emotionally or begin to feel resentful towards your ex due to the fact that they’re not the ideal person you believed they were.
If you are thinking about returning to your former partner be sure to remember the reason you ended up breaking up in the first instance and make a wise choice from that point on.
If you’re constantly thinking about getting back in touch with an ex, it’s time to do an honest reflection!
9. The attraction remains there regardless of whether the relationship doesn’t
The reason that most people are drawn back to their ex-lovers is that the attraction there!
If you’ve attempted dating others and still end up feeling a desire for your former partner.
In reality, many of us have someone who’s like us in that we feel a strong attraction. It isn’t a matter of whether they’re good or bad We’re all attracted to their character. However, we often misunderstand the source of our feelings from in the beginning of the relationship.
If you’re ever thinking about your ex-partner you should look away and evaluate the relationship in a neutral way.
This may seem like a difficult thing to do , but it’s very easy. All you have to do is an examination of the things your emotions and feelings will be telling you.
10. It’s not over yet. relationship between you
I’ve heard of instances where ex-partners continue to go back and forth even after having broken up for good reason.
The majority of people think that physical chemical processes is the reason this occurs. The truth is , physical chemistry could prove to be both beneficial as well as something that can be a curse!
There aren’t many couples that don’t share some kind of physical attraction. However, it’s also true that this attraction could be positive or negative.
If you’re drawn to anyone, particularly in the case where your mind is telling you something’s not right, even though there appears like nothing is wrong it’s normal to feel that they cause you to feel uncomfortable.
It all comes down to this:
When you’re drawn by someone else, you may be drawn back to them since your body tells you that this person is the best choice for your. Yet, at the same your brain is warning you that something’s not exactly right.
Then it’s your decision to determine whether this relationship merits fighting, and whether you’re willing to put your faith in your feelings.
If you’re able to answer “no” then it’s time to say goodbye and start a new chapter in your life.
11. You’re a lively opponent for them.
Let’s face it:
Everyone has a unique energy , and we naturally drawn to those who are energetic match for us.
It’s the reason you get so enthralled with your ex-partner despite the fact that there’s no rational reason for why you shouldn’t feel that the way you do.
However being an energetic partner is only possible when you’re in a real relationship. This is because it’s simpler to connect with someone in a relationship when your energy levels are similar to the level of energy they have.
So don’t be too surprised if your ex-partner is always returning to you, even though there’s absolutely no reason they shouldn’t be. It’s because of you being an ideal match for them!
12. You share friends who care about you
If you break up or with another person, it’s very easy to become disconnected from your circle of friends.
There’s no longer that person who you was a frequent visitor to and you’re now beginning to meet a new group of people.
These are the times when friends from mutual acquaintances can assist you to to reconnect. They may also be able to help you keep in touch even when you’re experiencing a tough time and can help you think of a time in the past that was a time when things were going well between you.
I know it sounds like cheesy but sometimes, you need to know that everything is going to be okay with someone who will always have your best interests in mind.
If you are contemplating a return to your former lover, you should talk with a person who knows you very well. They will give an honest assessment of the situation, so you are able to make the right choice.
You could also seek out support from people who have experienced similar experiences to those you’re experiencing right now.
13. They help you feel valued again
There will be times that you return to your former partner as they feel happy and at ease.
Then there’s the moment when you realize you’ve not felt like that for some time because you’re not being yourself.
It may sound odd, however it’s the truth:
If you’re feeling less than your self It’s normal to search for someone to help you feel like the old you.
Everyone wants to feel confident in our own skin, which is why we’re looking for someone to make us feel confident and complete. Our former partners know precisely what we need to feel happy and again!
However, remember that they come with their own baggage too. When you’re contemplating a return to your ex, you should try to make the right decision and again.
14. You and your partner haven’t changed your ways yet.
The reason people return to their ex-loves is because they aren’t yet completely over their past.
That is there are still unresolved problems with their ex-partner and aren’t sure if they should continue to move forward until the issues are resolved.
The most frequent issue among partners is the sense of being lonely and abandonment. The parties are both blamed for their separation, however, in reality it’s much easier to let things unanswered than to confront them once you’re all alone.
Even though the breakup is long and difficult but you must take care of things before you truly get over it.
And if your ex-partner continues calling you even though they’re working on their own problems, it’s a sign that they’re being held back from leaving you.
Pro tip:
Like everything else in life, going through tough times together can allow you to strengthen as an individual. In lieu of having to determine the reasons why you continue to love your ex even after many years of dating, try to figure out why your ex is always back.
If you answer “because you require them” Start creating an emotional connection between both of you in order to begin moving forward together.
Final thoughts
We’ve covered 14 reasons why we keep returning to our ex-lovers.
The truth is that there are many invisible forces that could keep you with your partner or end your relationship with your ex.
One thing is for certain that in the event that you continue going back to your ex-partner, they’ll continue to return to you. Therefore, it’s time to take the choice. Are you ready to make a change in your life or do would like to return to your former partner?
It’s entirely up to you, and there’s not a right answer. Think about it, and then focus on making the best choice for you.