You had a very unpleasant break-up: maybe your ex cheated on you, insulted you… or he or she left you without giving any reasons on the eve of your marriage.
Either way, it’s clear to you, you never want to hear from that person again. And then, one day, your ex calls you or texts you, casually: “How are you?” “Or even simply” Hello! “.
Once you’ve managed to see and understand the signs that your ex is coming back, here are the 3 possible reasons for what does it mean when an ex comes back?.
1. It means he comes back for sex
If you’ve always had great sex, your ex probably doesn’t want to give it up, and knowing that you must miss it, too, feels confident enough to give it a go. The problem is, “taking a good shot” is hardly going to compensate for the negative effects of seeing someone again who has hurt you so badly.
2. It means An ex comes back saying “I understood my mistakes”
When it comes to romantic relationships, most people get better through experience… and especially by making mistakes.
If your ex has figured out all of his messes with you and still thinks there was a very strong connection, he or she may have decided to come back and give it another try. Except… when the damage from the first attempt is still there, it is difficult for the second to succeed.
3. It means An ex returns out of nostalgia
Your ex has just found himself single! It is likely that at least at times, he or she feels lonely, doubts his or her choice, or realizes that he or she misses you. A short text allows him to probe your reaction to see if it would be possible to keep you under the elbow a little more.
So how do you react to your ex’s outstretched hand?
At first, it is likely that you will relive all the negative emotions associated with the breakup.
It’s normal. I’m even convinced it’s a maneuver by your brain to protect you: to remind you of everything you’ve been through with that person to prevent you from rushing into their arms again.
But among these emotions, there is obviously also the lack and the desire to see your ex again… and therefore, you will have to face the temptation to answer him, and to answer him quickly, in full emotional turmoil. Does that remind you of anything?
Take your time to make up your mind
The more that little text from your ex affected you, the more careful you should be in your reaction.
Remember that a ‘hi’ doesn’t mean anything, certainly not that your ex is ready to climb Everest to be forgiven and to spend the rest of their life with you.
Let a few days pass for the waters to calm down.
Until then, it is possible that your ex will send you other messages, which will give you more clues about his state of mind.
When you feel good again, think about what you would like from your ex.
And try to objectively judge if this is what he or she is offering you.
Remember that no matter what, you will not be able to resume your old relationship with your ex; eventually you can start a new, different and (that’s the point, at least), better.
It involves letting it go behind you and taking the time to re-discover that person who is in front of you and who must have changed since the last time.