If you are wondering what to do if my husband is bisexual, you will surely have many questions, and even doubts about whether you are with the right person or you may be afraid that at some point he or she may leave the relationship and replace you with another person of the same sex.
It is normal to a certain extent that this happens to you especially if your partner has just confessed it to you, so right now you may be feeling confused and that same confusion causes you to not perceive things differently and that you you feel blocked. It is for this reason that in this Bigmatrimonial article: my husband is bisexual, what do I do? We are going to inform you more about the issue of bisexuality and sexual orientation to finally provide you with a series of tips that will undoubtedly help you to know what to do and how to react to this situation you are going through.
What is sexual orientation?
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When we talk about sexual orientation we are referring to the attraction we feel towards other people . This type of attraction can not only be physical or sexual but can also be emotional, romantic and affective. Sexual orientation has nothing to do with the biological sex of the person, their sexual identity (the way in which a person identifies psychologically, whether male or female) or the social role that they exercise (cultural roles of male behavior or female).
According to some pioneers of this type of study, such as the creators of the Kinsey scale of sexual orientation, people can have different types of sexual orientation and we can simply classify it in this way:
- People who are attracted to others of the opposite sex who are considered to be heterosexual.
- People who are attracted to others of the same sex, called homosexuals. In the case of men, they are considered gay and women are called lesbian.
- People who may be attracted to others of both sexes who are called bisexuals. This type of sexual orientation may also be attracted to people with different gender identities such as transgender, intergender, gender, men and women, etc.
- People who do not feel any kind of sexual attraction to someone who are often referred to as asexual.
It is important to mention that many people do not feel identified by any label (bisexual, homosexual, lesbian, etc.) on the contrary, others feel more comfortable when they assign a certain label to themselves. Sexual orientation can remain the same throughout life but it can also sometimes vary depending on who you feel attracted to or with whom you are maintaining an active relationship.
False myths about bisexuality
Due to the lack of information that exists on these issues and in part also to social prejudices, a series of myths about bisexuality have been created that are really quite far from reality and that it is important for us to identify. In fact, if you wonder what to do if your partner is bisexual, it will surely be due to fears derived from these myths. Among the most frequent are the following:
- Promiscuity. It has been said that people considered bisexual are promiscuous since they are attracted to both sexes. However, there is no relationship between a person’s sexual and / or emotional attraction with promiscuity.
- Confusion. Bisexual people are said to be confused and therefore attracted to both sexes.
- They are attracted to both sexes with the same intensity. A bisexual person, just as a heterosexual would, may be more or less attracted to one person than to another. Not because they are bisexual they will not care about having relationships with all people.
- More venereal diseases or STDs. It is thought that bisexual people are more likely to suffer from some of these diseases, however, nothing is further from reality since a heterosexual person may have the same possibilities as him or her but take the necessary precautions when carrying out the act. sexual. So it does not depend on sexual orientation but on the care and precaution that the person takes, which is independent of who has sex.
- Infidelity. Bisexual people are said to be more unfaithful as they are attracted to both sexes, however this has nothing to do with it even though they have more choice (men and women). It is more about commitment and read to the person you love.
My partner is bisexual: what do I do?
Below, I will give you some tips and recommendations that you can take into account to help you know what to do in the face of this situation that has you puzzled right now.
Stop and reflect on how you feel
This news may have been totally unexpected and you are in a state of shock right now and above all because you have never found yourself in a similar situation. However, this very fact that it has never happened to you before or that you may not be well prepared or informed and have certain ideas or prejudices about this topic, is making you feel very upset and confused.
Therefore, it is important that you stop and give yourself a space to reflect on how you feel, what are the doubts or ideas they have regarding the issue of bisexuality, what are the things that worry you most about your husband be bisexual, etc. Try to clarify your feelings and your thoughts very well before moving on to the next step that would be for you to talk to your partner.
Talk to your partner
Let your partner know with all sincerity and respect the way you feel right now, what are your doubts and fears about it or what they were and that you have now resolved and try to clarify all these issues by your partner and understood by you. For example, if because of this you have begun to wonder if your partner would like to formalize the relationship more than you did and you have never asked him before, dare to do it and make all your doubts clear (and hers, of course ). That is to say, not because they are bisexual they are going to be able to have a formal relationship or not, this you could also tell them if they were heterosexual, it is always good to know the expectations that you have in a relationship.
Remember that the fact of your partner is bisexual and I have confessed it to you is a sample of the level of confidence that you have and it is an aspect that must also be valued. Think that not only because your husband is bisexual, your relationship will have less “weight” so to speak than if you were with someone heterosexual.
Fidelity, trust and love itself have nothing to do with the person’s sexual orientation , so if your partner is showing you that he wants to be with you and that he feels comfortable in the relationship, you don’t have to mistrust her. The chances that she has to be unfaithful or that you are unfaithful to her are the same as if your partner was heterosexual, as we saw previously, it has nothing to do with the other. This depends on factors such as the level of commitment, personal values, respect, among others independent of sexual orientation.
Make a decision
After giving yourself a space to think, having talked with your partner, that they have resolved all your doubts and shared their ideas and expectations about their relationship, it is important that you have your ideas and feelings clearly and also take the best decision for you. Remember that the important thing is that you act in coherence with yourself and that you feel comfortable and calm in any relationship in which you decide to be.
This article is merely informative, in Bigmatrimonial we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.