Relationship problems are an opportunity for growth and learning when viewed as such. What does the level of difficulty depend on in this type of situation? Of the very nature of the conflict, of the consequences and of the degree of trust existing between the two at the moment in which that event occurs.
How to solve relationship problems? In Bigmatrimonial we answer this question in order to help you move beyond that obstacle that does not have to be a limit, but a turning point if you learn some tips to solve relationship problems.
How to identify relationship problems
When a conflict is not dealt with in time it can generate a climate of disenchantment in the relationship that affects other spheres of it. Therefore, it is important to identify what the main conflict is and limit it. A conflict is a situation that is generating discomfort in the relationship. How to identify what is the point of vulnerability in this story?
Conflict can have a connotation for you and a different one for your partner, therefore, it is recommended that you both talk about what your perception is on this matter.
Dialogue in a context of listening and expression is constructive so that each can complement their own point of view with the other’s gaze. When each one expresses his opinion without interruption on the part of the other, it is positive that the interlocutor takes the floor to express what he has understood from that message.
Consequences of the conflict
The fact itself becomes a conflict not only because of its entity, but also because of the effects it produces. It is advisable to list what those consequences are seen from the point of view of each one and explaining the emotion that this reality generates in the first person.
When there is a conflict in the couple, it is possible that in the dialogue reproaches and deficiencies arise instead of assertive requests. When you express a complaint or use sarcasm as a way to show disappointment, you cannot get your partner to take charge of what you want to express. If you want your partner to understand you and know what you need, express it.
3 tips to solve relationship problems
How to solve couple problems? In order to solve relationship problems, whether due to mistrust, jealousy or because you are going through a relationship crisis, you can put into practice the following tips to solve relationship problems:
1. Win-win agreement
This trading scheme has not only an observable part of profit, but also of resignation. That is, it is only possible to reach that common meeting point through an attitude in which both yield to bring their positions closer. The basis of this growth mindset comes from the search for the common good.
2. Time frame
There are conflicts that may have characteristics of added complexity. Or, simply, the protagonists feel that they are not prepared to make a final decision on that matter. In such a situation, you can set an approximate time frame with your partner to reflect on that issue, seek information, seek advice, and ask for advice. Therefore, this period of time should not be taken from a vision in which the passing of the weeks solves everything by itself, but from a proactive attitude in the search for answers.
This conflict affects both of you although the interpretation of the fact is different for each one. To overcome a conflict in the couple, it is convenient to work as a team through collaboration in achieving the goal: the search for a solution. To do this, everyone can ask themselves what they can start doing and what they can stop doing to constructively influence reality. When each one of them positions their effort in this line, a facilitating environment emerges to resolve the conflict.
Communication tips to solve relationship problems
If you are wondering how to solve a couple conflict, you should know that communication is the basis for solving differences. What to do to approach positions in such a situation? Below, we give you the best tips to know how to solve a couple conflict through an assertive communication style:
- Seek union. Put the point of attention on what unites you to your partner, that is, on the bond. In this way, you reduce the risk of individualism.
- Describe objectively. Focus your argumentation on descriptive data about external actions and facts, but don’t focus on personal evaluations. Otherwise, through value judgments taken to the personal level, one’s attitude becomes a point of conflict.
- Suggest solutions. Brainstorm with your partner to propose solutions to this conflict, giving space to all kinds of possible alternatives. The challenge of this exercise is for the protagonists to decide for themselves which of these options will be the final one without the help of an external mediator.
- Measure the words. Use nurturing words to nurture mutual trust. The conflict can generate emotions of discomfort, therefore, it is convenient to reinforce love at this time. Simple words like “thank you”, “sorry” or “please” can facilitate the approach.
- Take care of body language. Your verbal language is important, however, body communication is even more significant in face-to-face interaction. Therefore, take care of your body’s expressiveness so that the message you send through this channel is aligned with your words and their tone. For example, take care of eye contact. But, in addition, pay special attention in the context of the chosen place to maintain the conversation so that it is a space that facilitates dialogue in a privacy environment.
How to solve a couple conflict? Love also grows with the experience of both by putting in value the learning acquired in the past in overcoming the present difficulties.
This article is merely informative, in Bigamtrimonial we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
Eric Cameron is a passionate relationship coach and counselor with a focus on helping couples reconnect and build strong and lasting relationships. He has years of experience working with couples and helping them to understand the intricacies of healthy relationships. He also provides guidance on how to maintain a healthy relationship and deal with difficult topics. Eric’s approach is tailored specifically to the couple’s needs and he has a wealth of knowledge and experience to draw upon.