A common cause of the breakup of the couple is a consequence of a lack of trust in the other. But is it possible to regain lost confidence? This may depend on the willingness of both parties to work for the good of the relationship. There should be no pain in the process, but once your partner is working again, your relationship may be stronger. In this article we will discuss how to save a relationship without trust.
Things you can do to regain lost confidence
- Don’t ask your partner to trust you. Especially if you hurt him deeply causing his mistrust. There must be congruence between your words and actions.
- Do not lie. It will only serve to end up breaking the relationship. The best thing to do is to speak honestly, even if your partner doesn’t like it, but sometimes it is necessary to do so to rebuild trust.
- Have no secrets. When you are in a relationship you cannot hide things because it kills trust and therefore the relationship.
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- Your partner has to feel safe with you. Show yourself as you are. This produces security to know your reactions and avoid creating false expectations.
- If you don’t know something, ask him. And especially if you don’t know how to handle the situation. Never assume that you know how your partner feels. Instead, listen carefully and ask questions, if necessary.
- Give it time . If the situation is the result of infidelity or a very deteriorated communication, a small separation could be good to overcome the crisis and relieve the pain produced.
- Don’t get carried away by anger. It is logical that you feel bad about reality and that negative emotions such as anger or sadness arise but this is the reason why you should distance yourself, go to the bottom of the problem and assess the seriousness of the consequences.
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- Don’t expect too much from your partner . All of us have a lot of defects and virtues, a character marked by our life experiences as well as an education. For all this, do not try to change the other and maintain adequate expectations.
- Your partner makes mistakes, admit it. Many can be forgiven, if will is put on their part. Also think about the reasons that led to the situation you are in. Think about whether you don’t make mistakes. We’re all human. If we think that we “never would,” we should bear in mind that life has a very clever way of proving us wrong.
- End the relationship with the third person clearly and openly, if this is the cause of mistrust. This person is a very important part of your relationship problem. Also, think that cheating is totally a choice and it is you who must assume your mistake by answering all your partner’s questions. He thinks that it is extremely difficult for that deceived person to know that, somewhere, there is another man or woman who knows at least as much about their relationship as they do.
- Stay by your partner’s side. Because he needs to work things out with you so you have to be sentimentally available. And physical presence can help a lot as it will counteract the feelings that you do not value her, that you make her feel number one, that you give her attention, and make her feel safe, that you are not going to cheat on her again.
- Be patient. The deceived person will be really hurt and therefore, if you run after him, the only thing you are going to do is make things worse. Therefore, patience … is the only way to regain confidence.
- Understanding. You must empathize with your partner to deal with the situation.
- Be consistent. Try to do everything you can to rectify the situation, without hesitation and in a consistent way. And thinking that you have to start from scratch to regain lost confidence.
The recovery of trust in a relationship can take a long time and it will take a great effort on the part of both of you to try to maintain assertive communication, the only way that the “legs” of your relationship do not break, definitely.
Mistrust is one of the main problems for which couples go to counseling, since it is one of the most common after bad or no communication, and, on some occasions, it causes the couple to break up, because the vital project in common, it breaks, and nothing is the same again.
Regaining trust is a difficult process that, with persistence and love, can yield good results. But, it is essential that if you do not see yourself capable of getting ahead on your own, you ask for help from a couples therapist who will guide you – in an objective way – out of your emotional labyrinth. Share this post how to save a relationship without trust on social media account.