Jealousy is a relatively natural emotion that appears in fear of losing the loved one. Therefore, it is normal that sometimes, in this case your boyfriend, may become jealous from time to time. The bad and dangerous comes when you experience them intensely all the time to the degree of pretending to limit yourself and not letting you lead a normal life.
As we well know, excessive jealousy can cause the relationship to deteriorate little by little and affect both parties, since not only the victim of such unbridled jealousy suffers, but also the excessively jealous person. This is why in this Bigmatrimonial article: how to deal with a jealous boyfriend? We are going to introduce you to a series of tips that will help you to better manage this situation.
How a very jealous person acts
Next, we are going to mention what are the main characteristics of highly jealous people focused on relationships.
- They exercise control over the partner. They try to keep you under control all the time, that is why they are always aware of what you do at every moment, with whom you interact, they are aware of everything you do on your social networks and even come to exert pressure on you to review them or check everything you have on your phone.
- Handling. They are people who tend to use emotional blackmail a lot to manipulate you and end up doing what they want. Generally they will want to manipulate you so that you do not interact with certain people or that you do not do certain actions because otherwise the offended and the affected will be made.
- Prohibitions. They tend to prohibit the couple from certain things, such as being related to people of the other sex, dating their friends, frequenting their family, even doing certain activities simply because they are not to their liking.
- Emotional dependence. They are highly independent so they are always seeking the approval of others and feel a great need to be with the partner caused by the great fear they have of being abandoned.
- Low self-esteem. They are people who lack self-love and who deep down do not feel worthy of receiving the love and care of another person in a sincere way.
- They explode easily. They tend to be quite reactive emotionally due to their great emotional imbalance, which is why, due to the slightest situation, they can have reactions that are overwhelming, such as hitting, screaming, crying, experiencing great anxiety and sadness.
What to do if my boyfriend is very jealous? 4 tips
If you still have doubts about what to do if your boyfriend is very jealous, it is recommended that you follow these steps:
- Talk to your partner. The first thing you should do is talk directly to your boyfriend , calmly and assertively comment on the way he is acting with you and the way those attitudes are making you feel. Try to speak with him clearly and sincerely, ask him to explain what his reasons are for acting like this and resolve together those misunderstandings that could have been generated.
- Set your own limits. In all kinds of relationships there are limits that must be respected and you must be clear about what they are. After you have done it, you need to let your partner know and clarify that you must respect them as it is part of the love and respect that there should be in the couple.
- Show him that he can trust. Tell him and above all, let him know through your actions how much he can trust you and that he really has no reason to feel jealous since you love him and nobody else.
- Let him know how much you love him. You don’t have to be showing him absolutely all the time how much you love him and that you care, but it’s also not about ignoring him. The important thing is that there is a balance and for this it is necessary that you always remind him either through your actions, some detail or comment on how much you love him and how important he is to you. In this way, you will feel more loved and valued and the confidence that you have will increase.
Jealous boyfriend: what to do
People who feel jealousy are afraid that they may be replaced by another, so they begin to generate some emotional distress, sometimes becoming pathological when they are not managed properly and when jealousy is experienced excessively.
- Reflect on the situation. There are situations especially where jealousy has been so exaggerated and overflowing that over time they have destroyed all or almost the entire relationship. So it is necessary that if you intend to continue the relationship you are aware of your feelings in these moments and that you think first of yourself and your well-being. On many occasions it has already been tried by all means to improve the situation and it has not been possible, so make sure that the best decision for you is to continue the relationship since in case it is not the best thing you could do is break with her even if it hurts at first.
- Couple therapy. If both of you have been fighting against such extreme jealousy for a long time and trying to move your relationship forward but feel that you have not done it alone, it is recommended that you receive couples therapy to save the relationship. The goal of therapy will of course be to help the jealous to feel better about himself and to learn to trust the partner. They will also be provided with tools so that they can both solve their problems in the healthiest and most assertive way.
This article how to deal with a jealous boyfriend is merely informative, in Bigmatrimonial we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.