How To Reconcile A Relationship After Break Up
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More and more couples go to marriage counselors or therapists and psychologists to go to systematic therapies, couple therapies or couple reconciliation. Why? Because of problems, people need solutions and results.
Many crises or conflicts occur because the people involved do not have the tools and resources to deal with the crisis.
When a couple loves each other, and they agree to solve their conflicts and improve, then it is worth trying to reconcile the couple without any doubt, either by resorting to a professional or by helping the environment of family friends.
Forgiveness And Couple Reconciliation
Forgiveness is a key factor in the process of reform of couples. Forgiveness is giving up your desire to see that punished person. Lack of forgiveness is the poison we drink to hurt someone else. Ultimately, the person who harbors the bitterness has to hurt instead of the person who goes to solve the problems.
The reconciliation of the couple on the contrary, replaces hostility and separation with peace and friendship. You have to learn to admit failures and mistakes, and be willing to consider and offer a change in attitudes and behaviors that contribute to the conflict in marriage or in the couple even if you are not married.
During the reconciliation process, users who have achieved this purpose have learned that they had to be willing to look at their individual failures and errors in the relationship. Both had to be open to change.
In the event that either of them (or both) are trying to overcome a depression , either through drugs or through psychotherapy, the problem can be originated and / or aggravated with other psychological and physiological problems derived from it.
This process is really amazing, as couples learn a lot about themselves and their surroundings, from their surroundings, from others. Probably the most important vision has been that you cannot control another person. The only person you can control is yourself, so your focus has to be how you can improve the relationship.
Finally, all couples realize that it is not what is currently their only problem, but that their own failures also count even if we find it difficult to appreciate them. Going to a professional gives you the necessary perspective to achieve a couple reconciliation by learning to make the appropriate changes at the right time.
Everyone has resources and personal tools that we learn from birth and that we develop as we grow, but sometimes, many are hidden and we do not finish exploiting them. This is when the therapist enters the scene and helps you move them forward to improve your love relationship and save it on time.
The fact that couples only focus on the problem and not between them is the key to the matter. Since focusing on the latter is not the same as the solution , it only creates more hostility and separation.
Read more: Couple Compatibility Test
Steps To Consider In The Recovery Of The Relationship
Couples seeking reconciliation in their relationship should consider the following steps.
- First, think about the specific attitudes and behaviors you are doing that contribute to the couple’s problems.
- Second, admit those attitudes and actions to your spouse in a timely manner. This is not a talk you want to have when you are both tired and hungry.
- Ask your partner for forgiveness, since it sure has been through a lot and they should do the same with you (ask for your forgiveness).
- Finally, the search for creative solutions that improve your relationship. Usually, we try to solve the problem before we fully understand what has happened. You have to learn to listen to the other and be aware of each and every one of the mistakes that have brought you to couples therapy.
In short, as you can see, the reconciliation of a couple is possible , either through the help of a professional psychologist or through advice on the network and through the help of friends or family. The goal is to find love for oneself and for the other member of the couple, because I can only give the other a healthy love when I first knew how to give it to myself.